This is a thanks to whoever left a comment on my previous entry. Whoever you are, and however you stumbled across my blog, I appreciate you taking the time to send me such a message. It has really lifted my spirits, which was much needed this evening.
Thanks!!
5 April 2008
4 April 2008
Oh gosh, is this what I've come to.....
For the last couple of weeks I've been relatively miserable. Not in a really terrible way, just in a sense that something is missing terribly from my life. It's not a what though.....it's a who.
I know it sounds ridiculous, but for the past at least 10 days, all I seem to have done is sat at the laptop and periodically clicked on the "reload live bookmark" button, just to see if a certain someone has posted any new bulletins. Just really to get an inkling of that person in my life. True I have called a couple of times, and we have spoken, but I find it hard to know what to say. I think the worst part is feeling that I should have so much to say, but never really having the courage to say anything. It's not liking picking things back up with an old friend (which I am finding increasingly difficult anyway), it's like a horrible longing for the right words to come along, and to suddenly be in deep conversation and be able to talk for hours.
Not only that, but this someone has been through an awful lot since day one. None of which, no matter what they have done, was deserved. Nobody deserves to be and feel what they have done. More than anything I want to be able to give this person back exactly what they have given me. A new view of the world, and a new outlook on others.
While a lot of people who have entered my life have been a continual disappointment, there are a slight few that haven't. A very very slight few. In fact, I think only three or four, one of which is them. Trouble is, while they haven't been a continued disappointment.......well I've not exactly shown my best side to them. How can I expect someone to be at their best, when I am not showing myself at my best? Thing is, mostly they have been. And there have been days when some slightly harsh words have been spoken between us, but I know in my heart somewhere along the lines it's just because they/I care.
I've never been in this deep with anything or anyone. Or longed, rightly or wrongly, to be around someone so much, and yet not known how to deal with it. So I've done all I know how, and that's read what they have to say and on the occasion left a comment. Just sitting and waiting for something else to read, so can use my imagination for a few moments, and just feel like they are talking to me, as often has done before.
This feeling, this awful sense of void, nothing, love and grief, emptiness, frustration, longing, and even happiness I feel is tearing me apart. It's complete nonsense really, and yet so overwhelming. Emotions can be that though can't they. They can be overwhelming. And no matter how many times I tell myself they aren't real, they are a figment of my imagination, it's all in my head, and one person does not require to have all these crazy feelings in association with another......It's that poxy ego that ruins everything.
It was a while ago that they told me they were broken. I said "no, you're not broken, you are just temporarily unfixed". What on earth is temporarily unfixed. How stupid a comment was it. I was trying to be helpful, and supportive, but without really doing anything much. Of course broken is broken. I figured temporarily unfixed was with a view to actually being fixed. Well broken things get mended. Broken is broken. Either way it can be dealt with.
The thing I long for most, I really really long for, is just a chance to hold that someone in my arms and just say thank you. I've said it a lot, but thank you never really seems to me to be enough. I want to do something incredibly extravagant I suppose, and just want them to know how it is that I feel about them, and what they have done for me. Even if the feeling is not reciprocated, it doesn't matter.
Thing is at the moment I cannot bare to see them, whilst longing to do so. I'm a bit on the emotional on-the-edge side. One moment I'm happy, the next incredibly sad. I can't even really bring myself to speak to them on MSN, when that's the easier way to communicate.
I suppose I am writing this with a view to them maybe having a glance, but I don't really want this to be th way that my feelings are shown to someone. I'll make gestures and stuff and do things but gosh. Even little things that I have done, or tried to do, to me just don't really cut it. When I said to them "I love you" I truly whole-heartedly meant it. They do in fact mean the world to me, and so much more. In fact I shall try to put it in this way. If we were both in a multi-storey building, and I was at the bottom, and they were at the top....If the building were on fire, or going to collapse, I'd rather not just simply run out of the building, I would in fact prefer to go to the top to be with them at the end, or at least die trying.
If I sound incredibly mental for thinking of doing such a thing, well then I am. I am, and I'm proud of it. Being mental isn't generally something to be proud of is it. But What really is a definition of mental. And in fact could you be mental? And more over, everyone is mental in their own right, so therefore who is anyone to judge my mentalness.
By the way, at the time of writing this, this was their latest blog post...Mother.
This person has such an amazing bond with his family it's uncanny. And when one walks into their house you can feel this weird lovely warmth all around. I shant say much more about the family, just know that I wish my family was like this one. By the way, their sister is included in my three or four. And yes she is special, and very hard-working, while at the same time very loving, caring, and everything a mummy should be. I'm not saying that mine isn't. I do love her, but she is very different from me, she's very uptight, and can't cope with much, worries even more than I do about everything, and is very much too much for me.
This is besides the point. I have digressed from my ramble. I expect if anyone is reading this, you are in fact very bored now, and probably were before I'd even started. I am not in a healthy frame of mind at the moment, and I find it increasingly more difficult to keep picking myself back up off the floor. Well really I can be so low that really I should say Earth's core...if it does actually have one.
I've been writing over an hour. I've smiled, and I've cried. My only little escape from this whole thing is sleep. I can't read anything, it all goes back to them...even the book I am reading, I read little bits, and I think, oh that's what they said, and reading beyond that point is useless as they are forefront on my mind, and I have no idea what I have read.
I'm not depressed, in essence I just miss them terribly, and yet am petrified of what will happen when I get the chance to see them...even just communicate a little. It's bizarre. It's horrible. I've had butterflies for days. Everytime I look at my phone I feel sick. Everytime someone signs into messenger I feel sick, and everytime I refresh their blog I feel sick. My belly just seems to be churning around in circles.
Please be advised that I only think of this person very highly, and will never have a bad word said about them. So if you want to say something, you can, just make sure it's nice. A bad thought about someone will come back and bite you on the bum.
Do I have anymore to say on the matter. Oh how I wasn't so confused.
It's like something I have read that someone else has written.....
Isn't it ironic that the one person who gives you strength and courage is your one weakness.
It's not ironic, I think it's an unwritten law personally, as in almost every case where strong emotions are involved............
I know it sounds ridiculous, but for the past at least 10 days, all I seem to have done is sat at the laptop and periodically clicked on the "reload live bookmark" button, just to see if a certain someone has posted any new bulletins. Just really to get an inkling of that person in my life. True I have called a couple of times, and we have spoken, but I find it hard to know what to say. I think the worst part is feeling that I should have so much to say, but never really having the courage to say anything. It's not liking picking things back up with an old friend (which I am finding increasingly difficult anyway), it's like a horrible longing for the right words to come along, and to suddenly be in deep conversation and be able to talk for hours.
Not only that, but this someone has been through an awful lot since day one. None of which, no matter what they have done, was deserved. Nobody deserves to be and feel what they have done. More than anything I want to be able to give this person back exactly what they have given me. A new view of the world, and a new outlook on others.
While a lot of people who have entered my life have been a continual disappointment, there are a slight few that haven't. A very very slight few. In fact, I think only three or four, one of which is them. Trouble is, while they haven't been a continued disappointment.......well I've not exactly shown my best side to them. How can I expect someone to be at their best, when I am not showing myself at my best? Thing is, mostly they have been. And there have been days when some slightly harsh words have been spoken between us, but I know in my heart somewhere along the lines it's just because they/I care.
I've never been in this deep with anything or anyone. Or longed, rightly or wrongly, to be around someone so much, and yet not known how to deal with it. So I've done all I know how, and that's read what they have to say and on the occasion left a comment. Just sitting and waiting for something else to read, so can use my imagination for a few moments, and just feel like they are talking to me, as often has done before.
This feeling, this awful sense of void, nothing, love and grief, emptiness, frustration, longing, and even happiness I feel is tearing me apart. It's complete nonsense really, and yet so overwhelming. Emotions can be that though can't they. They can be overwhelming. And no matter how many times I tell myself they aren't real, they are a figment of my imagination, it's all in my head, and one person does not require to have all these crazy feelings in association with another......It's that poxy ego that ruins everything.
It was a while ago that they told me they were broken. I said "no, you're not broken, you are just temporarily unfixed". What on earth is temporarily unfixed. How stupid a comment was it. I was trying to be helpful, and supportive, but without really doing anything much. Of course broken is broken. I figured temporarily unfixed was with a view to actually being fixed. Well broken things get mended. Broken is broken. Either way it can be dealt with.
The thing I long for most, I really really long for, is just a chance to hold that someone in my arms and just say thank you. I've said it a lot, but thank you never really seems to me to be enough. I want to do something incredibly extravagant I suppose, and just want them to know how it is that I feel about them, and what they have done for me. Even if the feeling is not reciprocated, it doesn't matter.
Thing is at the moment I cannot bare to see them, whilst longing to do so. I'm a bit on the emotional on-the-edge side. One moment I'm happy, the next incredibly sad. I can't even really bring myself to speak to them on MSN, when that's the easier way to communicate.
I suppose I am writing this with a view to them maybe having a glance, but I don't really want this to be th way that my feelings are shown to someone. I'll make gestures and stuff and do things but gosh. Even little things that I have done, or tried to do, to me just don't really cut it. When I said to them "I love you" I truly whole-heartedly meant it. They do in fact mean the world to me, and so much more. In fact I shall try to put it in this way. If we were both in a multi-storey building, and I was at the bottom, and they were at the top....If the building were on fire, or going to collapse, I'd rather not just simply run out of the building, I would in fact prefer to go to the top to be with them at the end, or at least die trying.
If I sound incredibly mental for thinking of doing such a thing, well then I am. I am, and I'm proud of it. Being mental isn't generally something to be proud of is it. But What really is a definition of mental. And in fact could you be mental? And more over, everyone is mental in their own right, so therefore who is anyone to judge my mentalness.
By the way, at the time of writing this, this was their latest blog post...Mother.
This person has such an amazing bond with his family it's uncanny. And when one walks into their house you can feel this weird lovely warmth all around. I shant say much more about the family, just know that I wish my family was like this one. By the way, their sister is included in my three or four. And yes she is special, and very hard-working, while at the same time very loving, caring, and everything a mummy should be. I'm not saying that mine isn't. I do love her, but she is very different from me, she's very uptight, and can't cope with much, worries even more than I do about everything, and is very much too much for me.
This is besides the point. I have digressed from my ramble. I expect if anyone is reading this, you are in fact very bored now, and probably were before I'd even started. I am not in a healthy frame of mind at the moment, and I find it increasingly more difficult to keep picking myself back up off the floor. Well really I can be so low that really I should say Earth's core...if it does actually have one.
I've been writing over an hour. I've smiled, and I've cried. My only little escape from this whole thing is sleep. I can't read anything, it all goes back to them...even the book I am reading, I read little bits, and I think, oh that's what they said, and reading beyond that point is useless as they are forefront on my mind, and I have no idea what I have read.
I'm not depressed, in essence I just miss them terribly, and yet am petrified of what will happen when I get the chance to see them...even just communicate a little. It's bizarre. It's horrible. I've had butterflies for days. Everytime I look at my phone I feel sick. Everytime someone signs into messenger I feel sick, and everytime I refresh their blog I feel sick. My belly just seems to be churning around in circles.
Please be advised that I only think of this person very highly, and will never have a bad word said about them. So if you want to say something, you can, just make sure it's nice. A bad thought about someone will come back and bite you on the bum.
Do I have anymore to say on the matter. Oh how I wasn't so confused.
It's like something I have read that someone else has written.....
Isn't it ironic that the one person who gives you strength and courage is your one weakness.
It's not ironic, I think it's an unwritten law personally, as in almost every case where strong emotions are involved............
3 April 2008
This is what I deserve....
I suppose, if this is the collective unconscious, well it just could transpire that it will go a lot further than being sat in a notepad in my bedroom for my eyes only. I suppose in one way it should be for my eyes only....afterall, these are my wishes. But why not share these with others? Afterall, someone might see, and think to themselves that maybe they might like that too.
So here is my list. Only 5 or 6 things......in no particular order...........
A fun and enjoyable job for this summer...
Finish uni with a first level degree...
A relationship, a proper one...
To travel lots and lots and keep travelling
Enough money to live comfortably
And finally, some acknowledgment that someone somewhere is reading my blog.
That's it. If I were to get those I'd be very happy indeed. And I do deserve to be happy. I deserve nice things. I've been miserable for years, and it's about time I did something, and had something to really really smile hard about.
The trick is to believe it, and knock my ego into shape. Bloody thing......
So here is my list. Only 5 or 6 things......in no particular order...........
A fun and enjoyable job for this summer...
Finish uni with a first level degree...
A relationship, a proper one...
To travel lots and lots and keep travelling
Enough money to live comfortably
And finally, some acknowledgment that someone somewhere is reading my blog.
That's it. If I were to get those I'd be very happy indeed. And I do deserve to be happy. I deserve nice things. I've been miserable for years, and it's about time I did something, and had something to really really smile hard about.
The trick is to believe it, and knock my ego into shape. Bloody thing......
I refer you...
... to a previous blog post, he who analyses too much misses the point.
Now then, back in September I would say yes, if you analyse everything, you will find that there is more to everything than you think and you are not going to like what you find. Or you will miss the point of what you are reading, watching, listening to. Mum had mentioned this to me while I was talking about happiness. I was telling her that you can't be truly happy unless you have been really really low, suffered that kind of thing. Which the amazingness had mentioned to me early on in our intertwingled lives.
I was thinking about hope. I wondered if I would in fact ruin it by really delving into the word and the thought. Who knows. I'll probably do it though. I found out last night that some things should be analysed. Some things, when analysed make more sense than if they are just taken at face value.
I am reading a book at the moment (yes, it's a surprise to me too) called The Moses Code. I do not know what possessed me to buy it, I just did. I don't even know how I came accross it, but before I knew it I was on amazon buying it. It claims itself to be "The most powerful manifestation tool in the history of the world". Now I don't wish to turn all magical, and simply get everything I ever wanted on a plate. I do wish to work a little to achieve some stuff. I do not wish to posses people either. I know what I want....I made a list of five things that I really really want. The list at this moment in time is not important. Nor is the fact that it's a book of manifestation. I was talking about analysis.
The writer, James F. Twyman, starts the book by going into detail about the story of Moses. Really analysing it, he goes quite in depth. And you know, there is a lot of stuff that I've never been able to pull apart before, because I wouldn't know where to start myself. No doubt I'd pull it about all wrongly. But now I've sat and I've seen how someone else does it, I think to myself, yes I can do that. It's actually really rather simple.
Analysing and interpreting, well this can lead to knowledge, and of course this leads to power. The amazingness has said so plenty of times. I knew he was right from the beginning....theres just some small part of my mind, somewhere alongside that ego that thinks I am worthless, that is always saying no. I'd love to shut my ego up. Because it doesn't believe in me. I am worthy, I deserve to have a moment to use my brain, I deserve to be happy, and mostly I deserve to be free.
Now then, back in September I would say yes, if you analyse everything, you will find that there is more to everything than you think and you are not going to like what you find. Or you will miss the point of what you are reading, watching, listening to. Mum had mentioned this to me while I was talking about happiness. I was telling her that you can't be truly happy unless you have been really really low, suffered that kind of thing. Which the amazingness had mentioned to me early on in our intertwingled lives.
I was thinking about hope. I wondered if I would in fact ruin it by really delving into the word and the thought. Who knows. I'll probably do it though. I found out last night that some things should be analysed. Some things, when analysed make more sense than if they are just taken at face value.
I am reading a book at the moment (yes, it's a surprise to me too) called The Moses Code. I do not know what possessed me to buy it, I just did. I don't even know how I came accross it, but before I knew it I was on amazon buying it. It claims itself to be "The most powerful manifestation tool in the history of the world". Now I don't wish to turn all magical, and simply get everything I ever wanted on a plate. I do wish to work a little to achieve some stuff. I do not wish to posses people either. I know what I want....I made a list of five things that I really really want. The list at this moment in time is not important. Nor is the fact that it's a book of manifestation. I was talking about analysis.
The writer, James F. Twyman, starts the book by going into detail about the story of Moses. Really analysing it, he goes quite in depth. And you know, there is a lot of stuff that I've never been able to pull apart before, because I wouldn't know where to start myself. No doubt I'd pull it about all wrongly. But now I've sat and I've seen how someone else does it, I think to myself, yes I can do that. It's actually really rather simple.
Analysing and interpreting, well this can lead to knowledge, and of course this leads to power. The amazingness has said so plenty of times. I knew he was right from the beginning....theres just some small part of my mind, somewhere alongside that ego that thinks I am worthless, that is always saying no. I'd love to shut my ego up. Because it doesn't believe in me. I am worthy, I deserve to have a moment to use my brain, I deserve to be happy, and mostly I deserve to be free.
1 April 2008
Sweet wrappers
How often is it that you actually even think to look at the inside of a wrapper, since those Treo days when they had games and things on the inside.
Well today I did just that. I bought a bar of galaxy, and the inside caught my eye.
This is what it said.......
It then says Galaxy Never stop falling in love. Which kinda ruins it a bit. Of course it's talking about the chocolate bar, why else would it be on the inside of the wrapper. But that's besides the point.
Love is a strange thing. And I don't mean to go on about Love at all, the amazingness did it already today. Read what he said about it.
I was just wondering to myself. How does one flirt? I mean what is it that you actually do to flirt? And on the process of falling in love, well how do you recognise that it's happening? And how do you stop it before it actually happens? Can it actually be stopped? And can people manipulate you, by flirting, to fall in love with them.
Emotions I suppose are created by humans, so I guess humans can mess about with them. I suppose it goes back to what I was talking about yesterday with people being powerful. I mean why stop there. Why just have power over someone in a normal everyday sense, if you have got the guts to do it and are evil and conniving enough, you can really really mess someone up.
How many days does someone have to sit holding back the tears. You know the hope is there. There is always hope, but does there come a time when you have to admit defeat? But then again, if you loose hope do you loose everything?
What is it that hope does that makes thing difficult seem a little bit easier? What is the reaction that "hope" kicks off?! I suppose, depending where you look you will come up with different answers. We'll start by looking at the dictionary for now.....The Oxford Essential English Dictionary:
What I want to know though is how hope came about, and why it is hope we look to when all else fails. I'll have a look and find out......more on this hope stuff soon.
Well today I did just that. I bought a bar of galaxy, and the inside caught my eye.
This is what it said.......
Falling into that beautiful thing called Love
(Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without-each-other love.)
ATTRACTION, FLIRTATION, EUPHORIA, DOUBT, THE TRUTH (The longer the better)
... And so you dance around it. You draw it out. You tease towards love.
This is pure physical poetry. It's the thrill of communicating by give and take, the simple charm of tugging at another heart and waiting (hoping) for a response.
It's the improbably joyus celebration of going absolutely nowhere for a long, long time ... all in the anticipation that you're actually on your way (slowly tiptoe-ingly) to somewhere truly marvellous...
It then says Galaxy Never stop falling in love. Which kinda ruins it a bit. Of course it's talking about the chocolate bar, why else would it be on the inside of the wrapper. But that's besides the point.
Love is a strange thing. And I don't mean to go on about Love at all, the amazingness did it already today. Read what he said about it.
I was just wondering to myself. How does one flirt? I mean what is it that you actually do to flirt? And on the process of falling in love, well how do you recognise that it's happening? And how do you stop it before it actually happens? Can it actually be stopped? And can people manipulate you, by flirting, to fall in love with them.
Emotions I suppose are created by humans, so I guess humans can mess about with them. I suppose it goes back to what I was talking about yesterday with people being powerful. I mean why stop there. Why just have power over someone in a normal everyday sense, if you have got the guts to do it and are evil and conniving enough, you can really really mess someone up.
How many days does someone have to sit holding back the tears. You know the hope is there. There is always hope, but does there come a time when you have to admit defeat? But then again, if you loose hope do you loose everything?
What is it that hope does that makes thing difficult seem a little bit easier? What is the reaction that "hope" kicks off?! I suppose, depending where you look you will come up with different answers. We'll start by looking at the dictionary for now.....The Oxford Essential English Dictionary:
Hope vb hoping, hoped 1 to desire (something), usually with some possibility of fulfilment: you would hope for their cooperation. 2 to trust or believe: I hope I've arranged that. >> n 3 a feeling of desire for something, usually with confidence in the possibility of it's fulfilment: the news was greated by some as hope for further interest rate cuts. 4 a reasonable ground for this feeling: there is hope for you yet. 5 the person, thing, situation, or event that gives cause for hope or is desired: the young are a symbol of hope for the future [Old English hopa]
What I want to know though is how hope came about, and why it is hope we look to when all else fails. I'll have a look and find out......more on this hope stuff soon.
Drip drip drip
Little April showers.
Well day one of April, and no rain. Frankly I am disappointed. I just fancy a nice big storm. Wind, rain, hail, flash floods....you know your everyday kinda stuff.
Pleasant weather is simply not on....haha.
Oh people moaning about the weather does my noodle in. I think weather is fascinating!! I came across a book about weather in Tesco's yesterday and I would have snapped it up fast had mummykins not been there moaning that it was a waste of money that I don't have. BUT IT'S WEATHER!! I love freak weather. Anything really. I don't mind a bit of sun, but only a day or two, or else I think it gets boring. Rain is the same, unless it's "good rain". Wind is alright, that never gets boring really, it changes direction and speed you know.
When I was younger I knew all the different types of clouds, what they meant. Same with fog. I think there are about 10 different types of cloud and four fog. If I remember rightly. Storms and hurricanes and tornadoes, that's what I want to see. All over the place.
So yes, people that moan about having rain and cold and wind.....get over it. It's such a British thing to do. Moan moan moan. Don't moan about something you have no control over please. Oh, there are places in the world where people would love to see a bit of rain. So they might just have some water in a pond closer than the 5 miles they have to walk to get to it now.
Argh.
Well day one of April, and no rain. Frankly I am disappointed. I just fancy a nice big storm. Wind, rain, hail, flash floods....you know your everyday kinda stuff.
Pleasant weather is simply not on....haha.
Oh people moaning about the weather does my noodle in. I think weather is fascinating!! I came across a book about weather in Tesco's yesterday and I would have snapped it up fast had mummykins not been there moaning that it was a waste of money that I don't have. BUT IT'S WEATHER!! I love freak weather. Anything really. I don't mind a bit of sun, but only a day or two, or else I think it gets boring. Rain is the same, unless it's "good rain". Wind is alright, that never gets boring really, it changes direction and speed you know.
When I was younger I knew all the different types of clouds, what they meant. Same with fog. I think there are about 10 different types of cloud and four fog. If I remember rightly. Storms and hurricanes and tornadoes, that's what I want to see. All over the place.
So yes, people that moan about having rain and cold and wind.....get over it. It's such a British thing to do. Moan moan moan. Don't moan about something you have no control over please. Oh, there are places in the world where people would love to see a bit of rain. So they might just have some water in a pond closer than the 5 miles they have to walk to get to it now.
Argh.
31 March 2008
Gandhi 1 - Lineker 0
As an avid reader of the amazingness I've just had a look at his blog, and read his latest little entry titled Ghandi quote.....
So it reminded me of a bit of a dilemma that Leicester is facing at the moment. In case you don't know, there is a proposal to erect a statue in Leicester City Centre. The problem is of who. Now the bronze statue possibilities have been whittled down to just two. Gandhi or Gary? While the names are somewhat similar, they are of course very very different.
If you don't know Leicester, while it's not the most attractive city in the UK, it is fascinatingly very culturally diverse. It's possibly the best feature. There are so many religious groups and varying communities with various different sets of cultural norms and values, and yet it's rather harmonious. The majority is pretty much the minority, and I think it's fantastic. Especially as WASPS (White Anglo-Saxon Protestants) are close to outnumbered. Maybe you don't agree with this being a good feature. I don't really care.
Gandhi has been proposed to represent the cultural diversities of the city. And for being such a great man. For doing so much for humanity. He's been a symbol of peace. Fighting for what is right without using violence. He is one of the few people that, as that is all that's needed, to put todays cultural climate and acts of unnecessary violence to shame. Leicester MP Keith Vaz said Gandhi's "philosophy of brotherhood among those of different religions and ethnicity should be honoured and celebrated. A statue of Gandhi will be an excellent symbol of Leicester's commitment to diversity." I think he's VERY right.
Of course a few of the WASPS have complained. Thinking that this again is something for the Asian community. Gandhi was from India, and therefore a statue should be erected in India, not Leicester. There are many local hero's including the man himself Gary Lineker (who would even prefer the statue of Gandhi). Gary Linker started his footballing career at Leicester City, and we can frequently see him now on saturday evenings presenting Match of the Day, and as the smiley big eared Walkers crisps man.
Now then, I think a statue of a man with a big grin and big ears, (lets face it he'd be wearing a suit, and holding a ball in one hand, and a packet of crisps in the other) in Leicester city centre would just look painfully wrong. Can't knock the man though for his sense of humour; Linekar said: "As far as a statue of me is concerned, frankly I think that is best left to other people to decide. Clearly the cost of such a statue will be a factor and perhaps the extra materials required for my ears would make the statue too expensive!” Well said!
If people want a statue of him in Leicester, then maybe they should raise the money alongside Leicester City FC and place a statue of him around the grounds of the Walkers Stadium where he'd fit in rather nicely.
Gandhi all the way. He such a great philosophy of life. And I don't know how there can be such a fuss over it. Again another thing that shows just how awful western culture is. One thing I disagree with on the Gandhi thing is his thought that a western culture would be a good idea. Scrap it is what I say. Go a little further eastern, a bit more magical, open minded, loving and peaceful. Western society it seems needs to take a leaf out of Gandhi's book. Nobody in the west is going anywhere fast!!
So it reminded me of a bit of a dilemma that Leicester is facing at the moment. In case you don't know, there is a proposal to erect a statue in Leicester City Centre. The problem is of who. Now the bronze statue possibilities have been whittled down to just two. Gandhi or Gary? While the names are somewhat similar, they are of course very very different.
If you don't know Leicester, while it's not the most attractive city in the UK, it is fascinatingly very culturally diverse. It's possibly the best feature. There are so many religious groups and varying communities with various different sets of cultural norms and values, and yet it's rather harmonious. The majority is pretty much the minority, and I think it's fantastic. Especially as WASPS (White Anglo-Saxon Protestants) are close to outnumbered. Maybe you don't agree with this being a good feature. I don't really care.
Gandhi has been proposed to represent the cultural diversities of the city. And for being such a great man. For doing so much for humanity. He's been a symbol of peace. Fighting for what is right without using violence. He is one of the few people that, as that is all that's needed, to put todays cultural climate and acts of unnecessary violence to shame. Leicester MP Keith Vaz said Gandhi's "philosophy of brotherhood among those of different religions and ethnicity should be honoured and celebrated. A statue of Gandhi will be an excellent symbol of Leicester's commitment to diversity." I think he's VERY right.
Of course a few of the WASPS have complained. Thinking that this again is something for the Asian community. Gandhi was from India, and therefore a statue should be erected in India, not Leicester. There are many local hero's including the man himself Gary Lineker (who would even prefer the statue of Gandhi). Gary Linker started his footballing career at Leicester City, and we can frequently see him now on saturday evenings presenting Match of the Day, and as the smiley big eared Walkers crisps man.
Now then, I think a statue of a man with a big grin and big ears, (lets face it he'd be wearing a suit, and holding a ball in one hand, and a packet of crisps in the other) in Leicester city centre would just look painfully wrong. Can't knock the man though for his sense of humour; Linekar said: "As far as a statue of me is concerned, frankly I think that is best left to other people to decide. Clearly the cost of such a statue will be a factor and perhaps the extra materials required for my ears would make the statue too expensive!” Well said!
If people want a statue of him in Leicester, then maybe they should raise the money alongside Leicester City FC and place a statue of him around the grounds of the Walkers Stadium where he'd fit in rather nicely.
Gandhi all the way. He such a great philosophy of life. And I don't know how there can be such a fuss over it. Again another thing that shows just how awful western culture is. One thing I disagree with on the Gandhi thing is his thought that a western culture would be a good idea. Scrap it is what I say. Go a little further eastern, a bit more magical, open minded, loving and peaceful. Western society it seems needs to take a leaf out of Gandhi's book. Nobody in the west is going anywhere fast!!
Comparatively equal
I am no better than you, as you are no better than me.
I am no more powerful than you, as you are no more powerful than me.
I am no greater than you, as you are no greater than me.
I am no more beautiful than you, as you are no more beautiful than me.
I am no funnier than you, as you are no funnier than me.
I am no more intelligent than you, as you are no more intelligent than me.
I am no lazier than you, as you are no lazier than me.
I am no happier than you, as you are no happier than me.
I am no crazier than you, as you are no crazier than me.
I am no stronger than you, as you are no stronger than me.
I am no braver than you, as you are no braver than me.
I am no more respected than you, as you are no more respected than me.
I am no stranger than you, as you are no stranger than me.
I am no healthier than you, as you are no healthier than me.
I am no more important that you, as you are no more important than me.
And the list goes on. I need to listen to myself on this one. I need to listen to myself 99% of the time. But everyone is equal. The amazingness is generally right, and on this one he is too. There are those that will stamp all over over you, abuse you, hurt you, patronise you, put you down, and rip you apart piece by piece until you have nothing left. And although they may make you feel as though you are absolutely nothing compared to them, you are. These people do not deserve you, and you do not deserve them. For everyone is equal. Everyone is a part of something big and great, and because everyone is part of something big and great, they too are big and great.
I have a feeling that people put others down because they are so insecure in themselves that it's the only way they know how to combat this. It's all in aid of power. But rememebr they have no more power than you do. The hierarchical system was designed by an insecure member of the human race to combat their own insecurities. With this system they could become powerful and mighty and much more important than everyone else. And the system still follows us around today.
People do incredibly dirty things to get to the top. Really dirty things, just to have power. And it disgusts me the way some people are treated in the name of power. I myself am ashamed to be part of the human race. There is so much injustice, and it's the people that don't trample all over others that get the brunt of it. This of course is designed by so-called powerful people. The insecure members that get so much out of kicking someone else and making them feel as tiny as possible.
If you only do one thing in your life, no matter where it is, who it is, just calmly tell one of those "powerful" people that you are just as "powerful" as they are. no more, no less. Because just that will knock them as much as they have knocked you. And then there will be some weird mutual level of respect. It's very clever.
I am no more powerful than you, as you are no more powerful than me.
I am no greater than you, as you are no greater than me.
I am no more beautiful than you, as you are no more beautiful than me.
I am no funnier than you, as you are no funnier than me.
I am no more intelligent than you, as you are no more intelligent than me.
I am no lazier than you, as you are no lazier than me.
I am no happier than you, as you are no happier than me.
I am no crazier than you, as you are no crazier than me.
I am no stronger than you, as you are no stronger than me.
I am no braver than you, as you are no braver than me.
I am no more respected than you, as you are no more respected than me.
I am no stranger than you, as you are no stranger than me.
I am no healthier than you, as you are no healthier than me.
I am no more important that you, as you are no more important than me.
And the list goes on. I need to listen to myself on this one. I need to listen to myself 99% of the time. But everyone is equal. The amazingness is generally right, and on this one he is too. There are those that will stamp all over over you, abuse you, hurt you, patronise you, put you down, and rip you apart piece by piece until you have nothing left. And although they may make you feel as though you are absolutely nothing compared to them, you are. These people do not deserve you, and you do not deserve them. For everyone is equal. Everyone is a part of something big and great, and because everyone is part of something big and great, they too are big and great.
I have a feeling that people put others down because they are so insecure in themselves that it's the only way they know how to combat this. It's all in aid of power. But rememebr they have no more power than you do. The hierarchical system was designed by an insecure member of the human race to combat their own insecurities. With this system they could become powerful and mighty and much more important than everyone else. And the system still follows us around today.
People do incredibly dirty things to get to the top. Really dirty things, just to have power. And it disgusts me the way some people are treated in the name of power. I myself am ashamed to be part of the human race. There is so much injustice, and it's the people that don't trample all over others that get the brunt of it. This of course is designed by so-called powerful people. The insecure members that get so much out of kicking someone else and making them feel as tiny as possible.
If you only do one thing in your life, no matter where it is, who it is, just calmly tell one of those "powerful" people that you are just as "powerful" as they are. no more, no less. Because just that will knock them as much as they have knocked you. And then there will be some weird mutual level of respect. It's very clever.
The whole is greater...
...than the sum of it's parts.
I randomly found myself watching Red Dwarf last night. I was more interested in keeping the dog quiet as dad had already gone to bed than the program, but my word, the telly might as well have been turned up about a thousand or so decibels because it shouted at me. And stood out like a sore thumb. Well had it been an image of a hand with a sore thumb it would have anyway.
I just went "WOW" and repeated it to myself over and over until I could actually make a proper note of it. It's a perfect quote, if from a rather bizarre source, but hey, the amazingness always says that randomness is the key. And I do believe that he is right. I generally believe he is right, but he generally is!!
So the quote then...I've had a look, many people have said it, but it possibly goes back to good old Aristotle, although some people have said that he could be paraphrasing it from someone else. The origin doesn't really matter at this very moment. It most commonly is used in business to help motivate team working. The whole is greater than the sum of it's parts. I suppose in this context means you get more done if you work together as a team.
I have thought though.....there's definitely a hidden meaning to this one. Well I say hidden, if you ask me it's blatantly obvious. And how nobody noticed it I don't know. If you are a whole person you function so much better than you do as a split person. And no I'm not talking about schizophrenics and so called "normal" people. I am talking about being really complete. Being able to follow your intuition entirely. Being in touch with yourself. Loving your self and only yourself unconditionally, with no exceptions. This is complete love, and not divided. Harmonising with your emotions, and most of all marrying up your mind, your spirit and your body, and recognising and using them in this lifetime as one entity. The left and right side. Everything wholly. Accepting who you are, and accepting everyone else, in their entirety.
Try it sometime. It's such a beautiful and perfect quote, and wholly motivating in every sense. It's simple yet effective.
Be complete. If you are complete then who knows what's waiting for you around the corner. It's bound to be something rather special.
I randomly found myself watching Red Dwarf last night. I was more interested in keeping the dog quiet as dad had already gone to bed than the program, but my word, the telly might as well have been turned up about a thousand or so decibels because it shouted at me. And stood out like a sore thumb. Well had it been an image of a hand with a sore thumb it would have anyway.
I just went "WOW" and repeated it to myself over and over until I could actually make a proper note of it. It's a perfect quote, if from a rather bizarre source, but hey, the amazingness always says that randomness is the key. And I do believe that he is right. I generally believe he is right, but he generally is!!
So the quote then...I've had a look, many people have said it, but it possibly goes back to good old Aristotle, although some people have said that he could be paraphrasing it from someone else. The origin doesn't really matter at this very moment. It most commonly is used in business to help motivate team working. The whole is greater than the sum of it's parts. I suppose in this context means you get more done if you work together as a team.
I have thought though.....there's definitely a hidden meaning to this one. Well I say hidden, if you ask me it's blatantly obvious. And how nobody noticed it I don't know. If you are a whole person you function so much better than you do as a split person. And no I'm not talking about schizophrenics and so called "normal" people. I am talking about being really complete. Being able to follow your intuition entirely. Being in touch with yourself. Loving your self and only yourself unconditionally, with no exceptions. This is complete love, and not divided. Harmonising with your emotions, and most of all marrying up your mind, your spirit and your body, and recognising and using them in this lifetime as one entity. The left and right side. Everything wholly. Accepting who you are, and accepting everyone else, in their entirety.
Try it sometime. It's such a beautiful and perfect quote, and wholly motivating in every sense. It's simple yet effective.
Be complete. If you are complete then who knows what's waiting for you around the corner. It's bound to be something rather special.
Hopes
Highly motivated achievers find the strength of their motivation in the power of their imagination. One of the wonderful aspects about human imagination is that it can see things not as they are now, but as they can be; it can foretell the future, based upon our beliefs and expectations, in an almost uncanny way; it can draw the colorful mental images that we hope someday to turn into reality. Imagination is the beginning of creation.
-Denis Waitley
Thanks to Cindy at Where's My Guru for this rather excellent quotation.
I read a question asked by a random person on a random website that I stumbled accross recently. They asked - Does consciousness create reality or does reality create consciousness?
Of course everyone can have their own view on this, and feel free to comment if you agree (or don't) but I feel myself that consciouness creates reality. Surely there is no reality if there is no consciousness. Everyone creates their own reality, with a little love and a little belief, and a lot of imagination and hope. It is hope that keeps people going. Hope that someone will recognise their achievements. Hope that someone will love them for who they are. Hope that someone will notice them standing there. Hope that things will be okay. Hope that the sun will come out tomorrow. Hope that they will find something or someone worth fighting for. Hope that they will recognise that this person is them. Hope for better times to come.
The list of things people hope for is endless.
It is when we loose hope that life fails us.
Keep your chin up, it will come soon, just believe!
29 March 2008
Times they are a'changin'
Quite literally.....the clocks go forward tonight....
And I'm loosing sleep over it!!
And I'm loosing sleep over it!!
Supermassive black hole
Okay, so here is what the lady said. She reckons that there is a super massive black hole in the centre of our galaxy, The Milkyway.
Now then, I have pondered on this a little since watching Universe last night. A black hole is created from teh death of a star, a rather large star. The gravitational pull in the centre of a black hole is so great that even light cannot pass through, hence the black hole. A computer program was designed to track stars, and show the way that these stars rotated or orbited around a certain area in the universe. Now because of the stars orbits it is believed that there is a black hole in our galaxy. I was thinking about this while watching the program. Thinking to myself that we are orbiting the sun. Which happens to be at the centre of our galaxy. If there was a supermassive black hole in that area then surely that black hole would have an effect on earth, and all the other stars and planets, and I would imagine that we'd get orbit the black hole, rather than the sun. It does however seem that this delightful black hole is in fact dormant. It has run out of fuel to be able to suck anything else in. Not so super anymore are you black hole.
But it could be given some energy of some sort and start sucking things back in. BRILLIANT!! Gasses and things go it's way please.
I also was amazied that Andromeda is moving towards the Milkyway rather quickly. A few hundred million miles an hour I think it is. Andromeda and the Milkyway will collide at some point. I got quite excited, and decided that I really want to watch it. But it's not going to happen for a few billion years yet. What a dissapointment. The exciting news is that this other galaxy Andromeda is much bigger than ours, and has a working supermassive blackhole in the middle. Now the collision will be kicking our one into shape by colliding with it, thus creating a super supermassive black hole.
It's all so perfect isn't it. The universe so it seems one vibrant happening place to live. Shame the excitement doesn't come to Earth all that often. I feel we've been swindled out of our money somewhat. This show is boring!! Hehe
Now then, I have pondered on this a little since watching Universe last night. A black hole is created from teh death of a star, a rather large star. The gravitational pull in the centre of a black hole is so great that even light cannot pass through, hence the black hole. A computer program was designed to track stars, and show the way that these stars rotated or orbited around a certain area in the universe. Now because of the stars orbits it is believed that there is a black hole in our galaxy. I was thinking about this while watching the program. Thinking to myself that we are orbiting the sun. Which happens to be at the centre of our galaxy. If there was a supermassive black hole in that area then surely that black hole would have an effect on earth, and all the other stars and planets, and I would imagine that we'd get orbit the black hole, rather than the sun. It does however seem that this delightful black hole is in fact dormant. It has run out of fuel to be able to suck anything else in. Not so super anymore are you black hole.
But it could be given some energy of some sort and start sucking things back in. BRILLIANT!! Gasses and things go it's way please.
I also was amazied that Andromeda is moving towards the Milkyway rather quickly. A few hundred million miles an hour I think it is. Andromeda and the Milkyway will collide at some point. I got quite excited, and decided that I really want to watch it. But it's not going to happen for a few billion years yet. What a dissapointment. The exciting news is that this other galaxy Andromeda is much bigger than ours, and has a working supermassive blackhole in the middle. Now the collision will be kicking our one into shape by colliding with it, thus creating a super supermassive black hole.
It's all so perfect isn't it. The universe so it seems one vibrant happening place to live. Shame the excitement doesn't come to Earth all that often. I feel we've been swindled out of our money somewhat. This show is boring!! Hehe
A link to the past
A link to the past,
But this is not the legend of Zelda
It is the legend of life.
Lying alone in the void,
The emptyness, the dark.
Pondering on the flashes;
Brightly coloured lights behind
The eyes of the unpredicted.
Surrounded by silence
Hearing the voices
The voices of now, then
And the flow of time.
Asleep or awake?
Both and all together
Thoughts and visions of
Days and dreams left behind.
Can't keep up with the race
Can't wake up from the deep
Can only manage to open up
And let light cover the darkness.
Days gone create new themes
New journeys, new opportunities.
A link to the past,
A love to the future.
I believe that the best time to reminisce about the past is as you are lying alone, falling asleep. The past never leaves. It is possible, if you are thinking about a past event when you fall asleep to dream of it, If you can visualize it in your mind quite vividly, feel that you are living each moment of it. If you do it right you can dream away the pain. You can re-live a past experience and make it more positive. Achieving in your sud conscious mind what you were unable to achieve consciously. Although the reality wont change, and you'll be where you are at, you can learn a lot from re-living something like this. This can often break old habits, and leave you wide open to new experiences. If you learn from your dreams it is possible to use this lesson when you come up to something similar in your wake. So, there we have it. That is what this means. If you learn from your past, without dwelling on it, it paves the way for a bigger and brighter future.
But this is not the legend of Zelda
It is the legend of life.
Lying alone in the void,
The emptyness, the dark.
Pondering on the flashes;
Brightly coloured lights behind
The eyes of the unpredicted.
Surrounded by silence
Hearing the voices
The voices of now, then
And the flow of time.
Asleep or awake?
Both and all together
Thoughts and visions of
Days and dreams left behind.
Can't keep up with the race
Can't wake up from the deep
Can only manage to open up
And let light cover the darkness.
Days gone create new themes
New journeys, new opportunities.
A link to the past,
A love to the future.
I believe that the best time to reminisce about the past is as you are lying alone, falling asleep. The past never leaves. It is possible, if you are thinking about a past event when you fall asleep to dream of it, If you can visualize it in your mind quite vividly, feel that you are living each moment of it. If you do it right you can dream away the pain. You can re-live a past experience and make it more positive. Achieving in your sud conscious mind what you were unable to achieve consciously. Although the reality wont change, and you'll be where you are at, you can learn a lot from re-living something like this. This can often break old habits, and leave you wide open to new experiences. If you learn from your dreams it is possible to use this lesson when you come up to something similar in your wake. So, there we have it. That is what this means. If you learn from your past, without dwelling on it, it paves the way for a bigger and brighter future.
28 March 2008
The soundtrack to your life
A song or piece of music has been created for every moment of someones life. At any given stage you can guarantee that there is a song with words and melodies that will fit exactly. And in many cases there are more than one. If you can't find anything in the vast musical abyss then I suggest writing your own song, which will of course be perfect to you anyway, and that is maybe the best way to do it.
Songs and magical moments. There are the cliche moments, like 'our song' that you share with a loved one, and the first dance at your wedding, and erm, your funeral too. But There are so many more moments that you will have that will have just as much of an impact.
I'd say, for every good thing you experience attach a song to it. Then every time you hear that song it will remind you of that experience or achievement and leave you feeling happy, or proud, or any other positive emotion you felt when you experienced it. If you use music in the right way it can really uplift your soul.
Songs and magical moments. There are the cliche moments, like 'our song' that you share with a loved one, and the first dance at your wedding, and erm, your funeral too. But There are so many more moments that you will have that will have just as much of an impact.
I'd say, for every good thing you experience attach a song to it. Then every time you hear that song it will remind you of that experience or achievement and leave you feeling happy, or proud, or any other positive emotion you felt when you experienced it. If you use music in the right way it can really uplift your soul.
I don't have problems getting an erection.....
Nor do I need a bigger penis, or bigger tits or bigger or better anything. I don't need things to enable me to have sex 10 times a day, or to make me last longer. I'm quite sure that if I wanted sex 10 times a day I could have sex 10 times a day!! Nor do I require a sodding fake rolex watch. I have a watch that tells the time....it's not a rolex, but I do believe it does the same thing?
I can't understand all this spam stuff. Do people seriously make money from sending out such complete and utter shite? Do I really need the same emails from the same people every day? I do believe that in some cases it is possible that if you keep advertising your services then somone will go, okay, maybe we do need thins, but what?! Not today, or in fact ever, am I going to read a shitty email from a gimp that can't get it up himself trying to tell other people to buy a load of stuff so that they can't either. FUCK OFF!!
In case you hadn't noticed, spam emails that I get repeatedly really annoy the hell out of me. Just stop it and give it a rest.....
I can't understand all this spam stuff. Do people seriously make money from sending out such complete and utter shite? Do I really need the same emails from the same people every day? I do believe that in some cases it is possible that if you keep advertising your services then somone will go, okay, maybe we do need thins, but what?! Not today, or in fact ever, am I going to read a shitty email from a gimp that can't get it up himself trying to tell other people to buy a load of stuff so that they can't either. FUCK OFF!!
In case you hadn't noticed, spam emails that I get repeatedly really annoy the hell out of me. Just stop it and give it a rest.....
27 March 2008
Fighting brain battles
I've got one part of me trying so very had, and another part fighting every effort I make. The result is like a clash of the titans somewhere in the middle ground, Armageddon I think. Some bits get through, some bits don't. Ultimately, the battle will be won by the strongest side, and that is the scary part. The winning part ((hopefully) will be the part with all the effort that I believe in so much, I feel it when it's working, so I know it works, it actually works, and I believe in it. Occasionally my confidence in it gets dented a little but it doesn't take long to make it up again. And I'll keep trying and trying and trying until I can try no more. And the only time I can't try anymore is when I am no longer alive. While there is fight in me there is hope. I hold the hope dear to my heart, and alongside that hope is the hope of you. The scary part is if this fails. It wont, I know it wont, I know I am well on the way to overcoming my weaknesses. Resisting temptations to take the easy way out has not proven too difficult, if a little inconvenient. I shall take baby steps, baby steps, so that I can take in each little accomplishment, and wear it with pride like a medal. For everytime I overcome is a step closer to the end goal.
I'm not moving
If things are going to happen, and the person that this is aimed at knows exactly what it is I am talking about here.
My promise to you is that I will not go anywhere until it has happened and it is over. I promise. And I'll tell you why in person. I have a whole lifetime in which to do what I want. And I figure, if I wait, you can come with me everywhere I go, which means you'll share every step of the adventure, the journey, to here, there, everywhere and far beyond.
You are wonderful, and no body will ever be able to take that away from you!!!!!!!!!!
My promise to you is that I will not go anywhere until it has happened and it is over. I promise. And I'll tell you why in person. I have a whole lifetime in which to do what I want. And I figure, if I wait, you can come with me everywhere I go, which means you'll share every step of the adventure, the journey, to here, there, everywhere and far beyond.
You are wonderful, and no body will ever be able to take that away from you!!!!!!!!!!
Two sides to every story
There's two sides to everything, at least. Some things and stories might have three or four, even more sides.
But can only one side be right? Or can they all be right? I expect the side that's right is the side that people didn't know about in the first place. The unknown side.
Think about it. If everyone says what they saw, and yet nobody actually saw something in it's entirety from an angle that showed everything in complete detail. For this we'll take an attempted murder as an example. Say a couple arguing, and things get a bit out of hand, and someone ends up getting hurt.
Now then We'll also say that this argument was happening in a street, and there were witnesses, all standing different distances away from the couple, all standing around in different angles. Now the couple are arguing about something. Each person hears roughly the same thing, but some are too close to understand the shouts, some are too far away. Now this couple could also be making reference to something unknown to everyone else. So therefore the witnesses could in fact take words out of context. Suddenly the man falls to the floor. He's been stabbed, by his partner.
So the witnesses come forward, they are all interviewed. The man's partner is interviewed, and because the man survives he is interviewed too. Lots of work go into the investigation by police. They seem to have everything they need from witnesses, with a few discrepancies here and there. Even the CCTV can't show exactly what happens, but nonetheless it seems like an ordinary case of man cheats on woman, woman gets revenge.
Everything is gathered, and it goes to court. The defendant, victim and witnesses are all questioned and cross examined. Stories seem straight, none get caught out while being cross examined, because they all believe that what happened happened in their head. There's not enough to go on for the jury to say whether the defendant is guilty or not.
You see while everyone thought they could have seen the man's partner stab him, what they didn't realise is that all she did was lift her arm to give him a slap around the face. There was a passer by that nobody noticed lurking in the shadows, who was well out of sight of the CCTV. He had a knife, and as the wife went to slap her partner, the man lurking in the shadows threw the knife, which conveniently landed in an area of the man, which the witnesses, from where they were standing, could likely be where she stabbed her partner, and yet she didn't.
So you see the other man got away. She gets found guilty of attempted murder, and goes to prison for a crime that she did not commit.
What I am trying to say is that things are not as they seem. Look at something from every angle. Try not to think about it, but most certainly do not judge. If you think you have seen everything from every possible angle, check again, I bet you haven't. The truth is often hidden. Even if someone only speaks the truth, the likely hood is that this is their truth. And not absolute truth. Because you see everybody interprets the same situation differently, and quite often, this is never the same as the next persons interpretation, or the last persons interpretation.
Another persons interpretation or opinion should not be judged however. For if you judge someone, someone else may judge you. It doesn't matter if you agree or disagree, because there will always be a hidden side anyway, but as it's hidden, there is no casting vote. As the amazingness says to me often, there is no wrong, there is no right......it just is!!
But can only one side be right? Or can they all be right? I expect the side that's right is the side that people didn't know about in the first place. The unknown side.
Think about it. If everyone says what they saw, and yet nobody actually saw something in it's entirety from an angle that showed everything in complete detail. For this we'll take an attempted murder as an example. Say a couple arguing, and things get a bit out of hand, and someone ends up getting hurt.
Now then We'll also say that this argument was happening in a street, and there were witnesses, all standing different distances away from the couple, all standing around in different angles. Now the couple are arguing about something. Each person hears roughly the same thing, but some are too close to understand the shouts, some are too far away. Now this couple could also be making reference to something unknown to everyone else. So therefore the witnesses could in fact take words out of context. Suddenly the man falls to the floor. He's been stabbed, by his partner.
So the witnesses come forward, they are all interviewed. The man's partner is interviewed, and because the man survives he is interviewed too. Lots of work go into the investigation by police. They seem to have everything they need from witnesses, with a few discrepancies here and there. Even the CCTV can't show exactly what happens, but nonetheless it seems like an ordinary case of man cheats on woman, woman gets revenge.
Everything is gathered, and it goes to court. The defendant, victim and witnesses are all questioned and cross examined. Stories seem straight, none get caught out while being cross examined, because they all believe that what happened happened in their head. There's not enough to go on for the jury to say whether the defendant is guilty or not.
You see while everyone thought they could have seen the man's partner stab him, what they didn't realise is that all she did was lift her arm to give him a slap around the face. There was a passer by that nobody noticed lurking in the shadows, who was well out of sight of the CCTV. He had a knife, and as the wife went to slap her partner, the man lurking in the shadows threw the knife, which conveniently landed in an area of the man, which the witnesses, from where they were standing, could likely be where she stabbed her partner, and yet she didn't.
So you see the other man got away. She gets found guilty of attempted murder, and goes to prison for a crime that she did not commit.
What I am trying to say is that things are not as they seem. Look at something from every angle. Try not to think about it, but most certainly do not judge. If you think you have seen everything from every possible angle, check again, I bet you haven't. The truth is often hidden. Even if someone only speaks the truth, the likely hood is that this is their truth. And not absolute truth. Because you see everybody interprets the same situation differently, and quite often, this is never the same as the next persons interpretation, or the last persons interpretation.
Another persons interpretation or opinion should not be judged however. For if you judge someone, someone else may judge you. It doesn't matter if you agree or disagree, because there will always be a hidden side anyway, but as it's hidden, there is no casting vote. As the amazingness says to me often, there is no wrong, there is no right......it just is!!
24 March 2008
Piece by piece; little by little
Things seem to be disappearing. Disappearing from my life, from everyone's life, from all existence.
And what is it? Life perhaps...............?? I don't know, nor do I understand it.
I found some old pictures on Saturday night, and looked at memories of what once were. While I don't wish to dwell on the past, occasionally it's nice to sit back, and just remember that no matter how I think and feel now, I haven't always thought and felt the way I do, and I wont always think and feel the way I do now. Everything is moving in a semi-forwards motion. I say semi-forwards, because the outcome of this movement seems to be going backwards.
I got pushed into the road in front of a car once, by the boy that lived next-door. I ran all the way across. My dad witnessed it, and it must have been one of the more heart wrenching moments of his life. I was only five or six. I got grounded for a day, and it was a couple of weeks before I was allowed to go out properly. I wasn't allowed across the road, or round the block. Instead I was allowed to go up and down the path.
When I was younger I had a bike, and I'd ride that bike all damn day. I'd often ride as fast as I could, just to prove to myself that I could keep up with the boys.....I remember that there was a corner that try as I might, if I went round it too fast I'd fly into a prickly bush. I did it so many times, and I never managed to get around it at speed. My other challenge was riding down the middle of my street no-handed all the way, only to grab the handlebars at the end to fly over the hill.
I'd play football, and though I was never all that good at it, I gave it a go. We played hide and seek, 50/50, there was a tree swing at the bottom of the road. We called the tree the lightening tree, on account that half of it was missing.
I do not remember what or how it happened, but the SNES had made it's way into my life. Then came the stereo. Then the lightening tree went, and we went to a different tree on the other side of the estate. This one had a rope and the swing was higher and faster, and much more......swingy. And I continued to play out during the day, and SNES it in the evening. And gradually the SNES became more prominent. If I wasn't playing it, I was watching my uncle play it, and my little brother. I remember when he first started to play it. He must have been about 3, and picked up the controller, and all he could do was push the left directional button. and we'd watch Mario get got, he'd die and the same thing happened over and over and over. Eventually he learned what to do, and became far better at it than I was. He became an addict, to the SNES, then the Megadrive, and then with each new games consul that came out, we got, and he played, and played and played.
I look at the world around me. While technology has advanced, people haven't. In fact people have most certainly gone backwards bit by bit, piece by piece, little by little. Technology in some ways is great. it has to be siad that there are some benefits, but it seems to be taking people away from being. Now there are a million channels to choose from...to watch complete rubbish. One thing is for certain they'll never run out of daft ideas to make a program out of. Some things you see on TV are just ridiculous, but then each to there own, and while there is a barmy audience out there, they'll make them.
What was the point of this blog?
Oh yes, I'm not sure what is drifting away...I am and I'm not, but this forwards to the backwards stuff that's going on will be the end of us, of everything.
People my age and younger, have lost a very important ability. What that ability is I don't really know, but it has been lost to a reduction of interaction. Interaction is no longer necessary. And when people do interact they don't really. I always rememebr my brother having friends around, one of them would be on the computer, another on the game boy, another playing the playstation, sitting in complete silence....except the occasional *pow* or *yeah*.
I played with myself, running around with mums scarf over my head, pretending to be a rabbit until I was about 12. I played with Barbie until I was about 12 too. When I was younger I had wicked imagination, but I was ridiculed by some friends for still doing that sort of thing at my age.
Friendship is bizarre. If someone is a friend you shouldn't ridicule them...should you? Surely you should encourage what it is that they do, even if you don't think they should be doing it. If a kid wants to play with Barbie and My Little Pony way beyond what was expected, then why not. Play Barbie with them.
Okay, I have no point, I don't have a clue what I am going on about. I just needed to jibber jabber a bit to take my mind off other stuff!!
And what is it? Life perhaps...............?? I don't know, nor do I understand it.
I found some old pictures on Saturday night, and looked at memories of what once were. While I don't wish to dwell on the past, occasionally it's nice to sit back, and just remember that no matter how I think and feel now, I haven't always thought and felt the way I do, and I wont always think and feel the way I do now. Everything is moving in a semi-forwards motion. I say semi-forwards, because the outcome of this movement seems to be going backwards.
I got pushed into the road in front of a car once, by the boy that lived next-door. I ran all the way across. My dad witnessed it, and it must have been one of the more heart wrenching moments of his life. I was only five or six. I got grounded for a day, and it was a couple of weeks before I was allowed to go out properly. I wasn't allowed across the road, or round the block. Instead I was allowed to go up and down the path.
When I was younger I had a bike, and I'd ride that bike all damn day. I'd often ride as fast as I could, just to prove to myself that I could keep up with the boys.....I remember that there was a corner that try as I might, if I went round it too fast I'd fly into a prickly bush. I did it so many times, and I never managed to get around it at speed. My other challenge was riding down the middle of my street no-handed all the way, only to grab the handlebars at the end to fly over the hill.
I'd play football, and though I was never all that good at it, I gave it a go. We played hide and seek, 50/50, there was a tree swing at the bottom of the road. We called the tree the lightening tree, on account that half of it was missing.
I do not remember what or how it happened, but the SNES had made it's way into my life. Then came the stereo. Then the lightening tree went, and we went to a different tree on the other side of the estate. This one had a rope and the swing was higher and faster, and much more......swingy. And I continued to play out during the day, and SNES it in the evening. And gradually the SNES became more prominent. If I wasn't playing it, I was watching my uncle play it, and my little brother. I remember when he first started to play it. He must have been about 3, and picked up the controller, and all he could do was push the left directional button. and we'd watch Mario get got, he'd die and the same thing happened over and over and over. Eventually he learned what to do, and became far better at it than I was. He became an addict, to the SNES, then the Megadrive, and then with each new games consul that came out, we got, and he played, and played and played.
I look at the world around me. While technology has advanced, people haven't. In fact people have most certainly gone backwards bit by bit, piece by piece, little by little. Technology in some ways is great. it has to be siad that there are some benefits, but it seems to be taking people away from being. Now there are a million channels to choose from...to watch complete rubbish. One thing is for certain they'll never run out of daft ideas to make a program out of. Some things you see on TV are just ridiculous, but then each to there own, and while there is a barmy audience out there, they'll make them.
What was the point of this blog?
Oh yes, I'm not sure what is drifting away...I am and I'm not, but this forwards to the backwards stuff that's going on will be the end of us, of everything.
People my age and younger, have lost a very important ability. What that ability is I don't really know, but it has been lost to a reduction of interaction. Interaction is no longer necessary. And when people do interact they don't really. I always rememebr my brother having friends around, one of them would be on the computer, another on the game boy, another playing the playstation, sitting in complete silence....except the occasional *pow* or *yeah*.
I played with myself, running around with mums scarf over my head, pretending to be a rabbit until I was about 12. I played with Barbie until I was about 12 too. When I was younger I had wicked imagination, but I was ridiculed by some friends for still doing that sort of thing at my age.
Friendship is bizarre. If someone is a friend you shouldn't ridicule them...should you? Surely you should encourage what it is that they do, even if you don't think they should be doing it. If a kid wants to play with Barbie and My Little Pony way beyond what was expected, then why not. Play Barbie with them.
Okay, I have no point, I don't have a clue what I am going on about. I just needed to jibber jabber a bit to take my mind off other stuff!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
